"Remove your clothes, I say, remove your clothes now!"
Mama Ngozi shouted at the top of her voice. People were beginning to gather in small groups. I was ashamed, very ashamed. I begged with all humility, but Mama Ngozi refused to listen to me. "take off those clothes, I say!" She shouted even louder.
Tears were beginning to drop heavily from my eyes. I have never been this humiliated in all my lifetime.
I took off my T-shirt and my trouser slowly. "Remove the singlet and the boxers too." She shouted again with merciless vibe. I hesitated. The crowd has now increased, so many onlookers gathered around me, fixing hungry eyes on me. I saw their brown teeth as they laughed at me, some of them brought out silly phones to video me, nobody seemed to pity me.
I went on my knees and begged Mama Ngozi, I begged for her sympathy, but two wicked slaps landed on my face instead.
HOW DID I GET THERE ?
It was a regular Wednesday, I was busy on facebook begging for nibbles bread as usual. Most of my friends online seemed to have bought nibbles bread for me already, except Ngozi Okafor. I haven't really had a conversation with Ngozi before, but she comments regularly on my Adventure Series, so I knew it won't be difficult convincing her to buy the bread.
"shae you know you are owing me?" I started.
"Me? What am I owing you?" Ngozi asked.
"Nibbles Bread." I replied
Anyway, to cut the long story short. Ngozi refused to buy the bread, because according to her, she was broke. I tried convincing her, but she maintained she was broke.
"As in bread o. Ordinary bread. Common #400 bread you cannot buy." I blasted Ngozi in my frustration.
"Broke Girl, and you will be forming slay queen on social media."
I could tell that Ngozi was angry, but she didn't show it. She composed herself and spoke rather calmly,
"Darny, I don't have money to buy nibbles bread, but my mother has a restaurant, if you are hungry just come, I will give you anything you want to eat."
Trust me na. I didn't delay. I asked for directions and rushed to Ngozi's shop. She asked me to order for whatever I wanted. I ordered for a plate of rice and pepper soup, and when I finished eating, Ngozi asked,
"Is that all you want?" So I ordered for a plate of Afang soup with fufu, two bottles of malt and extra chicken.
Ngozi's phone rang, and she went out to take the call. She didn't come back again, I waited for two hours and Ngozi was not back. The owner of the shop was asking me for her money, but I didn't know how to explain to her.
"Madam, it was Ngozi that asked me to order for whatever I wanted oo." I spoke finally.
"Ngozi!" The woman shouted, and a slim girl rushed into the restaurant. "Did you ask this man to eat my food for free?"
"No Ma," I chipped in. "It's not this Ngozi O"
"Which other Ngozi again? This is Ngozi, my only daughter." She said.
It dawned on me then that Ngozi Okafor, my facebook friend has used my head.
I could not cry.
"Remove that boxers, I say." Mama Ngozi shouted.
I removed my boxers, and the crowd burst into an uncontrollable laughter.